The Queen And The King

The room with the four doors!

Last night, I felt the presence of Aquiles in my room, and He had accepted that my body was out of bounds for him. Yet he did not leave. He positioned himself above my head in the energy of my crown chakra and this was a good place for him and for me to tolerate his presence.

All through the night, I felt, like I was in Peru, felt the atmosphere that he spreads around himself, when his mind is at rest and at peace.

We are both learning. He understood, what I prevented by cancelling his trip. He understood, what would have repeated itself. We would have had a short time together, re-energising many hungry beings and then I would have died. He would have taken another wife and nothing would have changed.

The first insight, I had gained from working with him, was the evil deed of my paternal great-grandmother and her three daughters.

My grandfather was a Lutheran minister in Lauf, a small town near Nuremberg. He was married to Helene, the love of his life. She died very soon, most probably from the effects of an extra-uterine pregnancy, a ruptured ovarian tube. After the traditional one year of grieving my grandfather was forced by his superiors to take another wife, otherwise he would have lost his parish, for a Lutheran minister has to be married, his wife is supposed to be part of his ministry and their family-life to provide a living example of faith and good conduct.

In our family, she was hardly ever mentioned and if so, only in the negative context. My grandfather was reviled, because he kept her photo on his writing desk all throughout his life and he was blamed for the suffering of grandmother, who was incurably and passionately jealous of her predecessor. When he died, her first action was the removal of her image.

Coincidence had it, that my maternal grandmother too was not the first wife of her husband. In fact she was the third wife, after my grandfather had been widowed twice. Not only that, she also inherited several children from the previous spouses of her husband. Yet she loved those children as her own and remained their best friend all throughout their lives. -

It did not go down well with my family, when I started to argue the point, that a woman must honor the love of her husband for his previous wife and it was the failing of our grandmother, to do this, that alienated her from him and him from her and laid the foundation for the permanent friction and unhappiness that later pervaded the family lives of all of their sons and daughters. I was surprised, how little sense my points seemed to make for my cousins and aunts, even less for my mother, though she should have known the example of her own mother. Then I suddenly understood, that she herself had been profoundly jealous of her older half-siblings. I understood that no matter what good or bad example you receive, it is always your own free choice, what you follow.

At the age of sixteen, I had met an old lady from Lauf, who had personally known my grandfather and Helene. She was the first and only person, who spoke well about them. In fact she praised them in the highest. The entire parish had been on cloud seven with the love of their minister for his wife. Like love-doves they had been and had kindled love in every heart.
She also related to me the story of his courtship for his second wife, my later grandmother. He had wanted to simply visit the family, but the mother had seen to it, that he was left alone in the living room with her eldest daughter for some time, then entered and with perfect theatrical skill feigned surprise, joy and consent to his assumed courtship for her daughter: "Oh, sir, I am overjoyed, you and my Käthe, how very nice!" - My grandfather was caught and could not get out of the situation without "dishonoring" a virtuous maiden.

During the first period of working with Aquiles, I became aware of the consciousness of this female ancestor of mine. I heard her thoughts and the conversations around the house during the time of Helene. "Oh, if only one of my daughters would be in this position. What a beautiful man. - Look, how shameless she is. How can she be so obvious with her love. She pulls him down into displaying his desire. They spoil the morals of our young people, etc. etc." - Four women cooking up an evil spell. Helene died. I became aware, that she had died as a result of an evil curse, even though those "female columns of morality" had never been initiated into the black arts. Not necessary. It worked regardless.

Should I speak of the abyss of doubt and desperation in my grandfather's heart? The secret accusations and hate for his fate and destiny, his struggle of faith and inability to accept the wisdom of God concerning this terrible loss? - He had resolved it by chastising himself for any outward display of love, joy and affection and fathered his children in this manner.

Dream:

I had a very strange last 48 hours. It started on Thursday evening. Something within me had relaxed. Some underlying tension had gone and I noticed it only by its absence, as if it was the first time of my life that I was free of it. I think, for the first time, this demon-presence had given up on me. So I went for a medicine journey to check it out and it was true. On Friday morning I fell asleep, slept through most of the day, had a few waking hours in the afternoon and evening, then slept again through most of the night and got up, more because I thought, I should, rather than from being awake. I still feel tired. But in the sleep I was also awake and aware of my dreaming, a lot more than before. - I was in a shared flat in my hometown Nuremberg, that I seemed to have rented and I was all the time thinking, but I am in my little hut in the forest, I am not in Nuremberg. There were four rooms and their four doors opened into a central living room. Somehow the central living room was mine. When I asked about it, the other flatmates said, that this was ok for them. I wanted to make myself some coffee but could not find my coffee maker. There were all sorts of similar coffee makers, but mine was not among them. Then suddenly the living room was full of beds, like in a hostel, no more floor space, just beds, one next to the other. One was especially large, next to mine. I thought, now there is no room to live and I was told, we would go out into the park during the days, but it was the cheapest way of living. I kept thinking of my little hut. - Then there were many people, all dressed the same way, black trousers and dark red shirts, short hair. I noticed they were all men and thought, I am sure there are women here as well, I know there are at least two women, because they had brought me here. I was among all of these people and I felt very small and odd among them. Someone said they are from Scientology. They all seemed to know a lot more than I. We seemed to be in a park, but at the same time in the flat. They started to chant, but I heard only a faint hum and didn't join in. They gave up and I was sitting at the bedside of a woman, working on her body, healing her. She said, how skillful I was. I said, yes, I can do these things. Then another woman came and distributed paints and paintbrushes. We were all supposed to create paintings together. When I opened my paint box, I saw that all the paints had been used before and had smeared into each other creating a nondescript color. Someone pushed me into a wet painting and my clothes got soiled. I took them off and found a basin, where I wanted to wash them, but there were suddenly a lot more clothes than mine and I had to search to find my blouse underneath. - Then I was shown a long board with a paper mounted on it and some clean paint to use. I was told, these were the most expensive paints and I should apply them to the painting. I saw they were of a green color, like jade, but when I dipped the brush into it, it was gold. I was lying prostrate on this board to do the job. I applied the paint to the painting and suddenly I realised that the board with me on top had been pushed through a window and I was hanging in mid air. I should have fallen, but I didn't and I slid my body backwards through the window. Then the dream stopped. I think these were dark angels, and whatever they tried to do, it didn't work.

Conclusion:

Three men gather and can rule the world. The meaning of "666"
Three loveless men can successfully extinguish the warmth of a woman:
Her father, her husband and her son.

One man can save the world by giving his body to save her body and surrendering his ego to renew her spirit.

Four women gather and can rule a universe. The evil of the Swastika, the "Gang Of Four".
This means, four loveless women can successfully kill a woman:
Her mother, her daughter, her sister and the second wife of her husband.

One woman can save a universe by letting go of her desire for her husband.

Three men around every one of those four women can rule time and space.
This means four women and twelve men can successfully dominate creation:
The realm of evil in the four quadrants of time, the labyrinth of Maya.

The husbands, who take concurrent, second wives open the door to the labyrinth of Maya, the wheel of birth and rebirth in the realm of suffering.

One man willing to give his body and surrendering his ego for love of his wife and 
one woman willing to let go of her desire for her husband can save creation from evil.
This is the fate of the King and the Queen, the lovers, who can never be united in this evil world, because the waters that separate them are too deep and dangerous.


In honor of Helene and Richard, my paternal grandfather and descendant of the Frankish King Charlemagne, Emperor of The Holy Roman Empire: